in plain view

Don't know if you saw
when I
glanced away

my eyes glaze, into space

your words bouncing back
void.

But before you get annoyed, dear
I just want you to know:

it's not you, it's me.

Just me,
looking for someone
more interesting

or smarter

or funnier

or better looking

so that when someone else
more interesting
or smarter
or funnier
or better looking

saw me
with that other person

they'd wonder if I was
more interesting

or smarter

or funnier

or better looking
than whomever they had been talking to.

And so on,

by increments,

I could maybe edge my way so far up

that everyone

would have to notice me

there
on the pinnacle:

the most interesting
the smartest
the funniest
the best looking
of us all.

and then maybe someday
someway

someone

would finally see me

finally talk to me

like I was really, truly

there.