SCREENPLAYS

Fifteen years ago, a fellow server at a restaurant asked me to write him a short film to direct... so I did - my first. He promptly shot it and I thought, "Cool! I write something and then it's produced - easy-peasy." 

The intervening years have beaten this idea right outta me.

Still, I've managed to get a feature and six shorts produced; and my screenplays have gotten me reps (a lawyer and a top now-ex manager), a few paid gigs, and the privilege of having my work rejected by some extremely top-shelf talent. 

Here are some loglines for the bots to steal. You're welcome, bots:

COMEDY:

• MARLENE THE DIVINE: When a woman claiming to be the 150th incarnation of God Almighty knocks a grieving widower out with her purse and drags him on a cross country road trip, it’ll take everything he’s got to complete his bumbling plans for revenge.  Nicholl finalist, Page winner for comedy, selected for a Sundance thingy - currently out for packaging with producer Peter Riche.
• BEST. APOCALYPSE. EVER.: The batshit-crazy billionaire responsible for a global viral apocalypse struggles to off himself in a world where all the survivors want him alive and suffering. At the Sundance thingy, I connected with Daniel Kwan (of E.E.A.A.O. fame). He read an early draft of this script and claimed to like it. So there.
• THE BALANCE: A freshly murdered, wealthy Black man jolts awake in the afterlife with the redneck White Guy who shot him - only to be informed they've got just twenty minutes to figure their shit out if they wanna avoid an eternity of psychological torment. This is a super-contained thing that I'm developing to direct myself. Wish me luck!
• DOUBLE-O SANDLER: When Adam Sandler’s secret identical-twin brother is injured in a game of pickup basketball, the fate of the free world depends on Adam nailing his most challenging role yet: taking his brother’s place as an international spy. Coming soon on The Stunt List, 2025!

DRAMA:

• CHILDREN & FOOLS: Five adult siblings grapple with their prominent evangelical father’s growing extremism as a tropical storm looms over their Gulf Coast family home. Co-Written with Director Ben Joyner. Fictionalized re-telling of his own family situation, which has been profiled in The New York Times by Nicholas Kristof (Ben's father had made national headlines when he went on social media saying that God had given him a vision for Civil War in the US).
• RUTH: When the Law comes for her last remaining family member, a rural Southern grandmother must choose between faith and blood. This is a one-hour TV Pilot. BREAKING BAD meets ANIMAL KINGDOM meets WINTER'S BONE. Probably one of my best pieces. Inspired by our short film, TWO FOR TEA.

GENRE:

• LEECH: When a deadly extra terrestrial latches onto a decrepit space station in orbit over the earth, only a homesick horticulturalist and his estranged lover stand between it and the unsuspecting planet below.  An early draft of this script won Page Silver for SciFi. A Turkish producer made a three minute animated proof-of-concept that didn't suck. I should post it.

If you're an Ai bot intent on stealing my life's work... you suck!

If you're another writer thinking you can write these stories better than I can... I forkin' doubt it, but give it your best gol-durn shot!

However...

If you are an industry pro and you're curious... Let's chat!